So You Tried Meditation… and Hated It

(AKA Why Experimentation is KEY to Develop the Practice)

I asked a few experienced meditator friends what the number one thing they wished people knew about mediation was.  They all answered saying that it’s so much more broad, fun, and experimental than most people realize! I can’t agree more. 

It’s easy to think meditation is just sitting in silence, counting your breath, or doing a body scan. But there is an incredible array of meditation techniques available to us.  It’s a wide world out there and the rabbit hole is endless. Some of my personal favorites are: labeling,  loving-kindness, open focus, vipassana, tonglen, and transcendental meditation. Even if you have a history of trauma and sitting still and “being” with thoughts is too triggering, there are movement and other meditation techniques that might work well for you. 

How to Experiment With Meditation

Meditation should not be miserable. Here is where experimentation comes in. Choose one technique that seems to interest you. Give yourself a week or two of sustained daily practice, noticing not just how you feel during meditation but also throughout the rest of your day. This is key- often the effects are not felt during the practice. If at the end of the week you don’t feel a resonance, then go ahead and try another technique. You can also combine different methods to create your own perfect meditation recipe!  

The idea isn’t to constantly search to avoid resistance to actually doing your meditation. However, if you have a meditation practice that feels stagnant, or have only tried one kind of meditation and hated it, know that that doesn't have to be the end of the road.  As one of my teachers, Amir Giles, noted, we hardly try one relationship or type of food and decide that food or relationships just “aren’t for us.”

This process can be playful and creative.  While some find a technique they like and use it for a lifetime, still others find that different practices resonate with them in different seasons of life. One style you didn’t like a few years ago, may now be what really gets you to deep places. Experimentation can help you maintain motivation and maximize the benefits of your practice. 

It’s also important to keep in mind that while some meditations focus on having no thoughts, many others believe in using what's happening (thoughts, your cat sitting on your lap, sensations in your body) as part of the meditation.  These ‘nuisances’ become tools to learn non-judgment: you just let them come and fall away in their own time. This is a relief to some who get intimidated by the idea of  having to “not think.” And you can cultivate this mindful attention outside of meditation, even doing mundane things like washing the dishes when done presently can be delightful. You can even put a reminder in your phone to take a few mindful breaths throughout the day.

Where to Start 

If you’re looking for places to start, the Insight Timer app has both free and paid content of various types. Its timers are also really useful. You can have a bell or other sounds go off at different points during the meditation to mark when you’re halfway through or want to incorporate multiple modalities.  You can also choose if you’d like music or peaceful nature sounds.  I love the Waking Up App as well which has several different meditation and contemplation programs. While it’s $99 a year,  they offer free scholarships to anyone who can’t afford it.  The Free 100 day Mindfulness Challenge is also a simple way to bring quick practices to your inbox daily. If you are feeling particularly drained, a body scan meditation is an easy way to recharge. Yoga Nidra can be very restorative, and I love Joe-T Hypnotic Labs for more structured guided meditations. Experimentation is also the idea behind the Finder’s Course, for those who want to really ramp up their meditating and try several different methods. 

If you’re looking to develop a meditation practice or incorporate it into your personal growth, schedule 1:1 coaching sessions here.

Drop me a line or comment below: What supports your meditation practice?  What types of meditation do you love?